CloseUp: Louis Bardel

How does one write about his life?

I was thinking of writing in the third person with something like “Louis Bardel moved to Los Angeles in 2006. Originally from the Big Apple, Louis…” Naah.

I’ll cut to the chase.

I want to produce a beautiful story. I want the viewer, the reader to be enchanted by gorgeous images and solid ideas. The feelings must be strong.

Ideally, I get a job producing, finding talent, or scouting locations. Currently I teach drama to youth in South Central Los Angeles.

Oh yeah, I'm a writer too.


Of all the jobs I’ve had I’m most proud of my stint as a researcher at the Village Voice, America’s largest alternative weekly. Rubbing shoulders with the likes of Wayne Barrett, Ron Plotkin, Frank Owen, J. Hoberman, Pulitzer Prize-winner Mark Schoofs paid large dividends. I got the chance to publish several articles and learn the craft of reporting.

My interests include politics, education, voodoo, chemistry, fashion, Latinos, literature, family, Arabs, extreme sports, humor, travel, movies, Blacks, automobiles, history, romance, Europe, North Africa, dancing, Asians, and bicycles.

Contact Louis
louisbardel@yahoo.com
www.stageandscreenwriters.com

Getting Your Script "Ready"

By Lynn Harrod

Writing a screenplay is no easy task. Don't let the overnight success stories you read about in Variety fool you. It takes more than a cool idea and a few weeks of writing to complete a script. And finishing a first draft is not finishing at all. It's just the beginning.

It takes time to revise it, revise it, revise it (sometimes completely rewrite it from scratch) into a work of gold, and gold it must be. As we've discussed before, there's no point in writing a "good" or "okay" script, because in this town, they are the same as "bad."

Your script must be GREAT -- nothing else will do -- and all great things take time. Even if you are a brilliant, seasoned writer, and even if you're able to spend all day, everyday, working on your script, it will still take a while. This is perhaps the first thing you must accept if you're serious about being a screenwriter.

There are many different approaches. Some writers create an extensive treatment first. Others write an outline. However you get there, your script should not be sent out into Tinseltown until it is "ready."

When exactly is your script ready? All beginning writers grapple with this question. My first response is that it's not ready just because you've finished it. The fact that you got to page 90 and typed "The End" means nothing. You are far from done.

Being "ready" realistically means...

1) You've completed a feature-length script, which is between 90-120 pages.
2) It has been read and critiqued by several trusted (and honest) friends and associates.
3) You've made revisions based on some (not all) of the feedback.
4) You've repeated Steps 2 and 3 until you felt that the script is as good as you can personally make it.

I must repeat that last step...

4) You've repeated Steps 2 and 3 until you felt that the script is as good as you can personally make it.

This means that you can no longer see any flaws in it. As far as you're concerned, it is perfect. When you send a script out, whether to an agent, a producer, or someone that can refer you to either, the script must be as perfect as possible in your eyes.

Don't make the rookie mistake of sending out a rough draft with a note, "I'm not sure about the ending, and the intro of the villain is kinda shaky, so I wanted to see what you thought." When you do this, you are essentially asking a professional to re-write or co-write your screenplay. An agent or producer will see this as amateurish and immediately toss it.

Armed with piles of Post-Its loaded with trusted feedback, you must revise your script until it is rock-solid. You may write seven, eight, fifteen drafts, so long as it gets tighter with each draft. Be careful not to get stuck in an endless time vortex, where you spend ten years revising the same damn screenplay. If you are truly improving it with each draft, it will be done.

When you finally do get that special feeling and decide that it is flawless, that there is nothing else to be done, you will promptly remove "26th Draft" from the cover. When you send it out into the world, as far as those agents are concerned, it is your first draft. The truth is, drafts are not actually used until the script is bought and/or in production.

Get that script written. Get it ready. Then get it out there.

[Lynn Harrod is a filmmaker, a seasoned screenwriter of twelve years. His work has placed in the Nicholl Screenwriting Fellowship, the Writers' Network Screenplay Competition, the FadeIn Awards, and the Nevada Film Office Screenwriting Competition. Lynn is a staff writer for IFLA.]

Targeting Literary Agents

By Lynn Harrod

Congratulations, you finished a screenplay. It could be your first or your tenth. You could have the goal of directing it yourself, or perhaps you simply want to sell it. For this article, let's assume that it's a feature-length script, and it's "ready."

Be absolutely certain that it's ready before sending it out for consideration. If it's not ready, it tells people that you're not ready.

Now let's find a literary agent. There's two ways to approach them. The first and preferred way is by REFERRAL. This means that someone the agent trusts personally refers you for consideration. Your script still has to knock 'em dead, but at least the agent reads your work. If they like it, or feel they can do something with it (i.e. sell it), they will take you on as a client.

However, most of us do not know someone with such ties. For the rest of us, there is the dreaded QUERY letter.

Queries are dreaded because they are difficult to write (whole books exist that cover this skill), because the odds are slim that they will work (most agents depend on referrals, and many ignore queries entirely), and because they require research.

Research? Yes, because a good query is targeted to a specific agent or producer. Rather than read like a form letter, it should show that you did your homework and that you are reaching out specifically to this person.

The most common advice is to get a copy of the Hollywood Creative Directory (HCD) or the Hollywood Representation Directory (HRD) and send a mass mailing to every agent listed. It's a start. More intelligent advice says to target specific agents, ones whose current and past clients write material similar to your own. This will increase the odds that they will ask to see your script, bringing you a step closer to being represented.

1) Make a LIST OF MOVIES that are similar to your script. Don't put too much time into this step. Just jot down some movies from the top of your head.

2) Go to AMAZON.COM. Look up each movie on your list. Notice that each movie has a section, "Customers who bought this item also bought..." and another one, "What Do Customers Ultimately Buy After Viewing This Item?" These sections will give you more movies to add to your list. Only add movies that are indeed similar to your script.

3) Take your revised list and go to IMDB.COM. Better still, go to IMDBPRO.COM. With the Pro version, you can get a paid membership, or sign up for a two-week free trial period, which should be plenty of time for our research today.

4) Look up the movies on your list. For each movie, make note of its SCREENWRITER(s).

5) Look up each screenwriter and make note of their AGENT (or manager, if agent is not listed), including their mailing address and email, if listed. Now your list of movies is beginning to look like research. Each movie is similar to the script you just wrote. Jotted next to each title is the writer and his agent or manager, along with contact information.

6) Compose a master QUERY letter. If you don't know how, look into it and return to this step. Basically, the letter must sell you and your script as succinctly as possible.

7) Leave one paragraph of the letter open to PERSONAL INFO about the agent. This is where you will show off that you did your homework, "I feel Risk Factor will complement the espionage thrillers of your clients, Joe Bronton and Frank Carillo." You are basically creating a form letter, and then tweaking it for each person you send it to.

8) SEND OUT your letters. Snail mail used to be the preferred choice, but email is quickly becoming the new standard. Unlike a paper letter, which takes effort to open and respond to, an email is one click to read, another click to reply to. An agent will go through dozens of email queries a day, while perhaps putting off opening the snail mail queries (or not opening them at all).

If you do choose to email, make sure the subject line is something that will garner their attention. If you placed in a writing contest, make the subject "Chesterfield quarterfinalist," etc. If you were a soldier in the Iraq war, or used to be a stripper, or any past life that has to do with the script, mention it in the subject, "Script written by defected soldier," etc. This will virtually guarantee that the email will be read, versus something generic like "Read my query" or "Consider my new script."

Lastly, keep track of who you send a query to and when. Email makes this easy. After you send out an email query, look for it in your "Sent" folder. Move it to a new folder, such as "Agent Search." It serves as a convenient record for all your queries.

Future posts will deal with creating a solid query and following up on them and script submissions.

[Lynn Harrod is a filmmaker, a seasoned screenwriter of twelve years. His work has placed in the Nicholl Screenwriting Fellowship, the Writers' Network Screenplay Competition, the FadeIn Awards, and the Nevada Film Office Screenwriting Competition. Lynn is a staff writer for IFLA.]

Writers' Strike - Why We Fight

A simple explainer as to the issues causing the current Writers Strike. [WGA.org]

How to write an episode of The Dukes of Hazzard

You too can be a Hollywood scriptwriter for one of the most exciting series on television! Just follow this simple tutorial and you'll be writing Dukes episodes in no time... [continue]

everything2.com

How to Find Weaknesses in Your Script

By Don Bledsoe

The new screenwriter tends to have a love affair with is/her "baby." He's married to every word and nuance he's carefully scripted onto each page. Often, it reads more like a novel than a screenplay and usually it needs a serious rewrite. It's time to get a divorce.

You must not be afraid to hack, chisel or cut-out ANYTHING that does not serve to push the story forward. Sooner or later, you'll write a scene that is just plain good. You're in love again and all is right with the world. Finally, you conclude that it doesn't serve the story as it should. You must get a divorce and hack it out of the script.

Remember: not every story is movie material. Not every story is as fascinating on the screen as it is in our heads. This is especially true of biographical stories. As interesting as someone's true-life experiences are, they rarely translate well to the screen. However, it often makes an excellent bestselling
book.

In screenwriting, you only have TWO TOOLS to work with in a screenplay:

DIALOGUE: that characters say
ACTION: a visual description of what is seen on the movie screen

This does NOT include:

* Anything anyone "knows" (i.e. "Ed heard about Jennifer's problem at school.")
* Anything that cannot be photographed (i.e. "Mary loves chocolate ice cream.")
* Anything the audience "knows" (i.e. "This is the same woman we saw earlier at the bar.")
* Any background information (i.e. "John is Tom's best friend.")
* Any action description that uses '-ing' words. (i.e. "Sue is reading the newspaper." should be "Sue reads the newspaper.")

Here's a common sense approach to self-analysis of your own screenplay:

1. Read some FIRST-RATE scripts!

You need outstanding examples of well-written screenplays against which you can compare your work objectively. I recommend you read at least three, preferably nine, screenplays. Here's the catch: You MUST read them ALL in the same week. Agents and development executives read 35-50 a week on their own time so I know you can read at least three. Don't look at a single page of your script until you've finished reading the scripts you downloaded. Read one (or more) in each of the following categories:

* One in the same genre as yours,
* One that's been made into an OSCAR-winning or nominated movie, and
* One that's an all-time favorite movie of yours.

2. Now: read your script.

It might seem a little different now, but that's GOOD. You're becoming a little more objective.

3. Read yours again: OUT LOUD.

Isaac Asimov: "Either it sounds right or it doesn't sound right."

You might be amazed at how you'll spot those things you know need a little extra attention. They're those things that seem "odd" or don't feel "right" to you when you read it out loud. You might find yourself thinking that certain characters say and do things that don't seem to "fit" their backstory. You likely find this especially true of dialogue. Circle these dialogue passages so you can come back to them later.

4. Act it out.

This is also an opportunity to get actor friends to read your script. If scenes are awkward or don't come across as you intended, they need work. Stage a reading of the script. Make sure all of the actors get a list of the characters they will portray and have someone assigned to all of the lesser, incidental characters. Don't prep them! Let the actor get the information about the character only from the script. If he doesn't get it, neither will an agent, reader or producer; and you need to go back the set-up the character so he DOES get it. During the reading, mark scenes that don't work or have the intended impact and come back to
them later.

5. Read it through out loud again, but only the ACTION DESCRIPTION.

Movies are a visual medium. If your story isn't visual, maybe it shouldn't be a movie. Did you get lost? Are things vague? Are the scenes not visual? Can you tell what's going by the visual clues? Mark those scenes and come back and flush them out a little more.

6. One more time out loud, but this time only the DIALOGUE.

Do characters seem to drone on and on? Can't tell WHAT they're talking about? Do they talk about things not essential to the scene? Mark these scenes and come back and rewrite them later.

Rule of Thumb: Scenes and dialogue should start at the point where, if you cut out the start of the scene, what follows doesn't make sense any more. This also applies to movies. Many screenplays really start around pages 30-50, which means the writer spent way too much time setting up the story. How do you tell? As you read, it suddenly seems as though you've started a "movie in a movie" and you like it better than the one you started. Time to get divorced. Unsure? Write a second script and see which version you like best.

Writing is Rewriting

Ernest Hemingway: "Don't get discouraged because there's a lot of mechanical work to writing...I rewrote the first part of Farewell to Arms at least fifty times."

Paddy Chayefsky: "I'm not a great writer, I'm a great rewriter."

Good advice from two guys who ought to know.
[Don Bledsoe started young, producing a short film for NBC while still in high school. He worked in the Story Department at Paramount Studios at age 19 and later as an actor and makeup artist in film and television in Hollywood. A self-confessed computer geek he took up screenwriting in the early 90's and founded Script Nurse in 1999.]

Paul Haggis - Interview

Acclaimed writer-director Paul Haggis has been a fixture of television and film for over 25 years. In this wide-ranging interview, the Oscar-winning co-screenwriter, director, and producer of Crash (Best Picture 2005) discusses his three-decade career.